Rabu, 26 Juni 2013

BB: Edisi Juni


Hai hai haiiiii. Udah sekian lama aku gak curhat pake bahasa ibu sendiri, berasa rese banget. Hahaha. Ngomong-ngomong mengenai judul di atas, apa itu BB? Bebas Berekspresi. Udah gausah dipikir kenapa dinamain kayak gitu karena aku sendiri juga gak tau.

Berhubung sekarang lagi nganggur jadi aku berencana mau menuhin blog pake sesuatu yang gak seberapa penting (kayak ini) itung-itung buat bayar yang dulu. Yang dulu yang pas aku sibuk banget sampe berbulan-bulan gak ngepos sama sekali. Hiks. Betapa pada saat itu aku berharap bisa meliburkan diri berminggu-minggu di rumah demi lepas dari tugas-tugas yang hina itu. OK! WISH GRANTED! Teretetetetettttt sekarang aku libur selama tiga minggu. Tuh tuh, bisa dipake buat bikin Kimchi lah di rumah tapi sayang aku gak suka Kimchi jadi itu gak mungkin. Rasanya kayak...kayak kalo kita beli Fiat di Italia, terus kita nunggu shipping, terus bayar bea masuk dll, terus ngurus STNK dst dst gimana? Lama kan? Lama kan? Sebel gak sih nunggu yang lama-lama itu? Nyebelin kan? (kayaknya ada maksud lain) Ya itu yang aku rasain liburan sepanjang ini tanpa ada planning liburan sama sekali. Mungkin ntar bakal ada tapi....where is the fun kalo cuma sehari...habis itu nganggur lagi. Aku mau sama keluarga aku semuanyaaaa, terus pergi somewhere dimana kita bisa bener-bener refreshing dan quality time banget. Hng, I miss my whole fams.

Mungkin bakal banyak yang beranggapan "Apa sih ini gak ada syukurnya banget dikasih libur 3 minggu ngomel-ngomel mulu"

Enggak! Bukan itu maksudku yaampun -_- Siapa sih yang gak seneng kalo dikasih libur sepanjang itu? Aku seneng kok. Aku bahagia. Aku...aku bersyukur banget. Cuma... apasih yang perfect di dunia selain Tuhan? (ciyeee) Semua hal kan ada plus minusnya, dan kebetulan yang aku demo disini itu sisi negatifnya. Gitu lho!

Yang aku pengen sekarang ini itu liburan bareng keluarga aku. Soalnya ya...ya gimana sih habis ada konflik kan harus ada klimaks dan perbaikannya. Jadi...

Ah sudahlah jangan bahas ini.

See you deh buat Edisi Juli :*

Sabtu, 22 Juni 2013

Unplanned


“You got 3 freaking weeks of holiday. What you gonna do?”
“……..sleeping?” 

NO! Hahahaha. But, really, guys, that’s a very long day. Enough to make me forget what math is, what sociology is, what chemistry is….though I don’t even have chemistry class in school. What you expect me to do?

Not that I’m whining about it. I’m happy. But 1 week later, maybe not anymore.  I’m not sure if my family already had a plan to go somewhere in this period, they never tell me. There always be a day when I play with my laptop and suddenly my Dad brags in, “Let’s go watch some movie” “In cinema?” “No. We have a 40 inches TV why would we go to the cinema?”

Jerk. That’s unexpected though. It always happens in such a wrong time.

There always be a day when I patiently wait for the download then my Dad comes to bother, “Let’s go to the ***. So please, can you turn your laptop off?”

Thank you, Dad. I freaking thank you.

In the next following weeks, I hope I’m not just laying, sleeping, eating, playing computer and writing crap on my blog but….travelling? Having a trip to another city? That would be nice.



Oh, Man of Steel next Wednesday :D

Senin, 17 Juni 2013

Heart Issue


someone broke mine years ago
and i somewhat jailed it up
no one has the key
no one brings the key
i don't care

then you come
then you somewhat wanna change me
wanna set mine free
you bang the door
aiming a gun
and i'm just standing here
watching

then one day you come again
you smile
you show me the thing in your hand
that's the key
my key

Ominous



It's 5:45 pm
Someone pokes me;
trying to wake me up from my dream
"Hey, the moon is already up. Go take a shower!"
I open my eyes to see someone's face;
my Dad
I groan, roll over;
still not having heart to get up
Maybe some little more minutes

It's 6:30 pm

Finally I open my eyes;
to see the dark room;
it's my room, of course
I cringe at the coldness
and someone's sob
Someone is crying
The voice is deep
The silence of the house makes it clearer;
and scarier

That's a man;

and my Dad is the only man in the house
My Dad...

He is crying

I've no idea about what kind of shit is bothering him
I stare at nothing, trying to find a clue
But no, I still have no idea

What could make a grown-up man crying?

A 16 years old girl has no idea.

Kamis, 13 Juni 2013

Untold Secret (12 of May '13)


Written on May 12th 

I keep on deny this feelings inside me
'Cause it's deniable 
'Cause as I keep on thinking about it;
it hurts
Is it wrong if i feel so insecure about it?

Things just too mainstream
If I go with the flow then it's not me
'Cause I'm one of a kind
I'm like this when people like that
I wear blue on funeral when the others wear black;
if you know what I mean
Because I'm just being me
Nothing is wrong with that

Then you come and somewhat changes the atmosphere
I think you can take me with you
But then I feel so pathetic and naive
Why do I believe someone like you

You think everything is funny
Playing with heart is funny
That heart is belong to someone;
not yours

Then I go away,
I mean, I try
Now that even if you are here next to me
You've no idea about how far we actually are

Selasa, 11 Juni 2013

A Boy and The Guys


A boy has two different roads in his love-life. First, is a crush, someone the boy might fall in love with because of her looks, her outer beauty. Second, is someone the boy feels comfortable with, someone the boy likes because of her personality, her inner beauty. Between these roads, a boy, or even a grown-up man, feels the difficulty of choosing, and their ego speaks.

I might be not a professional in this (so-called) psychological thingy but this is what I saw from my point of view.

Someone ever said: "She's gorgeous. I like her. I want her to be my girlfriend" and deep in his mind, he said again "So that my friends would envy me for having her as my girl"

That's real, though, someone said that years ago. And now that I thinking about it again, he is so naive and pathetic, well, he is just a boy in his puberty. What could I expect from him? 

And nowadays, many guys thinking that having someone so gorgeous outside is making them proud. Proud that their friends envy them, people not looking down at them and whatever. But that's not what love is about, seriously. 

It's 2013 already and maybe I'm not in my position to say things like this but, again, could you at least use your heart, please?