Who You

credit: Deary Dream

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SooYeol/MyungYeol Fanfiction

Length: Drabble

Warning: Cliff-hanger, confusing plot, has been done roughly in 10 minutes, grammatical errors

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I close my eyes and I see myself in a room, alone. It's dark but I'm sure it's me in the middle of the room, since there is a lil bit of light coming through the tiny window. What am I doing there? So funny. Questioning myself when the one creating the scene is no other than me. 

Sometimes I just sit on the couch, doing nothing, seeing Sungjong interacts with Woohyun with smiles on their faces. Then suddenly I feel so lonely, like nobody cares about my existence. Even my bestfriend, Myungsoo. Does he get bored with me? Am I that boring? Or is it just me being overly sensitive? 

I do not know. I do not have any idea. 

Sometimes I find myself laying on my bed, staring at the ceiling for almost an hour. Doing nothing productive until the manager calls. 

And one day I found Sunggyu and Woohyun somewhat having a deep talk but when I called them they suddenly stopped talking. They asked if I already had a breakfast but I didn't answer and walked out instead. 

What am I really? Were they talking about me? What did I do? What sin have I done?

"Sungyeol" 

I know that voice, even with my eyes closed I could imagine the figure standing in front of me, calling my name. 

"Are you okay?" 

No, are you okay? Am I boring? Am I no longer funny and entertaining? Why do you seem so far away that I don't even dare to reach out for you?

That's the question I want to ask to him. 

He has been asking me that since forever that sometimes I check myself on the mirror to see if I look so pale or sick or something. He is so weird, which is nothing new.

"Sungyeol, you're not sleeping. Open your eyes and talk to me!" 

So, I open my eyes only to see his concerned face. Is he sad? Does he have a problem? Now that he doesn't feel okay he searched for me? Really? Where are you at your happiest times? You left me behind. 

Oh my God. Why am I so negative? 

"Don't just stare at me. Please, say something"

I can't. My voice will crack and I'll burst into tears. 

But...

"You've changed" 

He is there, frowning. 

"No, Sungyeol. I'm still-"

"Enough with the bullshit, L" 

Shit. My voice cracks. If I continue this I will turn into a crying mess. I even call him L. We're alone in the room and I call him L. 

"I will explain some things to you, Sungyeol. Please listen to me" 

But I can't. I look at him in the eyes, almost teared up. Then I choose to walk away like what I did with the others. He is trying to chase me but I push him hard enough. 

It's not the time, yet.